All the food for June

You know, sometimes I read my old blog posts, fb posts and twitter and wonder to myself: what the hack was I writing about? The emotions were so strong in the posts but I just can't recall what they were about. I mean.. to think about it... Sometimes I know that when I look at it in future, it will be something I will remember, plus it's about someone I can't name so openly. So if it's something I can't remember, it most probably means that it wasn't necessary for me to even have that post. haha! It's so lame. But even so, that's okay because these are public domain and one just can't be too sure that any thing like that wouldn't go viral or known to that person eventually cos the world is just so small. BUT THEN... my written diary (yes, I still keep one).. No one is going to read it, except for myself, and I write like someone is. -.- I looked back and there are some things I cannot recall at all. And there's no way to check against either cos then it should have been the fall back part right. HAHA! What was I thinking, seriously. Anyway, so... I should share some positive stuff. :)

OH WELL... just when I thought birthday was over.
I have been meeting people and eating non-stop 2 weeks following the birthday (Birthday started on 11 Jun). And I'm almost dying from the food though I'm happy every single time with friends.

120616 is over.

也许现在我不太看重‘生日’这件事，有一点点是因为几年前认识了苏打绿以后青峰说的一些关于生日的事（就不必在这里说了）

谢谢看到脸书说是我生日然后用了几秒钟祝我生日快乐的人们。虽然不是一件什么大事，不就是打那几个字吗？但你做了吗？看着这些祝福的名字一一出现，不禁有些感慨。就连一些我不太熟的朋友都做了，有些多年的朋友却认为我不值得他生命里的几秒钟。好吧，就叹个气而已。因为是在意的人才会有这样的感觉的。其实我已经很高兴了，因为我没有想到会有这么多人不止用fb的方式，而是更直接的whatsapp :) 我觉得跟我想的一样，是更有意义的。

今年最大的不同呢，就是，我们15年的友谊就这样散了。因为除了我们几个以外，其他人都是如此的被动。谁都会累的。在没有人主动的提问下，被动的人就没有反应了。反正他们也都只顾自己啊。我们没有谁怕谁的，不知道是哪一边出了问题，无法避免的，就算我这几年多么努力的想把大家拼在一起，最后累的是我自己。不拼了，结果就是粘不在一起了。朋友也是两方面的，我想跟你联络做朋友，也要你肯付出时间和精力跟我做朋友才有用。最近终于看到什么朋友真心，什么朋友一向敷衍，或只是出于习惯跟着而已。

觉得很对不起常常以我们为重要的朋友出发的朋友，有时我会冷淡的对待，但是.... 现在开始我不会了。另外一群也是如此。也许，对他们来说，我也是出自于习惯的出现；可有可无。因为已经在一个群组里，不可避免的带着我一起而已。哈哈！

现在起做一个称职的朋友吧。

(朋友太多，但到最后，我从来就觉得选择比较重要的朋友是一件很困难的事）

And well, all these will be visible when the birthday comes. Why?

Real friends wish you happy birthday and ask for a meet up and really meet up with you. Or even, before the birthday comes, not even having to say it's for your birthday. Normal friends wish you happy birthday and that's it, or say meet up soon but that soon never comes. Effort is the word. 

Anyway I think that personally I'm quite an awkward person. I don't like all these stuff but I get a little disappointed at times when it happens to other people and not me. Haha. Just can't make up my mind if I want to feel awkward with all these people staring at me or sad that no one actually cares to plan a little. HAHA!

Time really passes so quickly. Looking through instagram having photos of past year(s) just can't seem to allow me to gauge how long it felt since the last, last last, or birthdays 3, 4, 5 years ago. It's amazing how my feelings haven't changed all these years; that I actually don't mind having the whole day to myself. 

And I will do it next year. I promise. 

說出來就好了

《放不下的活著》 - 插班生

今天會像昨天一樣吧
時間它走得多麼瀟灑
上一秒還好好的笑著
怎麼了

還以為開始慢慢忘了
還以為自己變堅強了
卻突然  聽到你最愛唱的歌了
又突然  整個心掉進黑洞了

放不下的  是你給過我的溫柔
想太多  才會把一切錯過
誰會預料  誰能接受
一刻不小心變成永遠的痛

放不下的  是沒對你說的所有
還有好多好多話想要說
你好嗎  聽見了嗎  想你了


原本就覺得是好聽的歌... 後來聽到933聽眾分享這首歌很有意義的時候, 多留意了歌詞. 感謝.
"放不下的  是沒對你說的所有
還有好多好多話想要說" 也許就是我最放不下的吧.


最近幾天小憂鬱了一下, 是很無聊的憂鬱. 但確切是為了什麼,也不太清楚了.
很想yolo一下, 但看來這次是不行了. :(
明年吧, 反正情況還是會一樣的吧.... 不是什麼高興的事, 可是我就是覺得還是會一樣. 我認了.
我對我的運氣已經不抱太大的希望了. 因為拿到這份工作的時候應該已經用完了,而且應該還不夠用. 明白就好 :(
明年就30了! 啊!
真的想一個人去走走啊... 還是只是因為快到六月了呢? 不知道為甚麼, 只要六月即將來臨, 我就有一種不安... 心裡真的好不安... 好像每天都有一千噸的重量在心上. 曾幾何時, 我多麼害怕生日的到來了呢?
而怕的理由竟然不是因為年齡長了一歲... 畢竟這麼多年來, 我從來不抗拒說出年齡這件事.. 所以這樣也是醉了... >.<

做決定的時刻

Don't know if I should take this trip. Either way they are places I have been... many times. HAHA.

But I've also been wanting to do a solo trip during my birthday period. And these 2 are my only choices, because I also happen to have friends in these 2 places. And I have just decided in my head that it will be Taiwan. HAHAHA =x Provided leave approved and parents not upset over me going alone without them. Cos mum had to say it that day that we should go taiwan next year. Right. It was supposed to be this year, but somehow plans changed.

[26/5/16] Okkkk.... I didn't post the above when I was trying to make a decision that day. And so, now I will do so. Decided not to go during the birthday period and put it off to next year instead. Well, 1 reason being the air ticket price has gone up over the past few days... to a price that I don't think I want to spend that kind of money. Another reason is when at least 2 people told me not to go. Because true friends will tell you the truth even though you are the only paying for it. As much as I don't want to be shaken by other people's decision. But I asked.... right? hahaha. Next year lah... I have a better plan for that :)

Gonna try to persuade mama to go taiwan in Dec first.... So it will be guilt-free when I decide to go next year. HAHAHA :D

All right.... 現在先透露到這裡，其他的下次再說。:)

An additional 'burden'

Today, it's the first time I pay for a TM Wealth Enhancement policy plan premium.

I'm not sure if it's just me or it's the same for people of my generation.

At this point of time, I am still very very very skeptical of what this plan will bring me, even with all the papers on the premium terms with exact numbers on it.

Not exactly skeptical on what I can get out of it after 25 years, more like skeptical if I will be able to fulfill the premiums fully before I take anything out of it. And that is scary because oh man... When I see "25 years" now I still feel the same: that's a hell long time! I don't even know what will happen to me in the next 5 years, let alone 25! And the nature of my passion and work made me more skeptical about all these. I don't even know where I will be working, if I will get married, have any children, have a house, have a car, or even, if I'll still be alive! 

So... I've been wanting to do something like that since I started working, but also due what I've gone through for the past 6 years... there was no security in my life, there is no stability and I can't afford at all, though it would have been better if I have started earlier.

Maybe I'm ready now, maybe I'm not. But I have taken a step. So I'll just have to do it now. For the next 20 years! :o

And then... down to the next thing I want to tick off my list. ;)

就更新一下

很久什麼也沒po了。

也許，有很多事情是不適合在這裡寫的。雖然我的人生也沒什麼好藏的，但也沒有什麼好分享的。就是一個‘無聊’。

除了工作，多數的時候都回家了。現在週末也不會一心想出門了。（有時大家在家的時候還是會）但我又不是那種沒事會一直問朋友要不要出去的人，所以特別的難。反正不是習慣一個人了嗎？

謝謝現在的我把很多的心情放在工作上，畢竟它佔了我們人生多數的時間。很高興我做的是我喜歡的。有怨言但也不太多，每個人偶爾都會埋怨一下吧。這個世界上不可能有完美從來不埋怨的人，所以我覺得《On Call 36》的‘車車’是不可能存在的。所以我當然也不會是一個聖人。但我卻學到了很多，領悟了很多，也很清楚不可能永遠賴在這裡不走，因為這個地方是沒有辦法往上走的。

Oh well, at least I have been and done it. Some day, I will go further. 

其實有蠻多心裡有一點開心的事，但覺得不好在這裡分享了。我知道就好。:) 

希望其他人有找到自己想走的路。也希望我可以繼續尋找下一個想要的東西。謝謝。

PS: Honestly, I tried to update a piece about some things worth noting from last year, but never got myself to do it properly. And I guess I won't be doing it now. Sighs. =x

我愛台灣 (2015跨年版)

如果要說說我現在過得如何，還不如說一些快樂的事。

至少我做了一件瘋狂的事；跟一群朋友一起瘋狂。這也算一件我夢寐以求的事：到台灣跨年去。朋友總是說等她換工作，不然跨年的時候她都得工作。2014年，她換工作了。我們招攬了親近的朋友，一起早早的訂下這趟旅行。而且，2014年，他們都陸續去了台灣，但還是答應了一起去，真的非常感謝生命中有這些朋友。我，有他們，是幸運的。

我只能說這是一趟超乎想像的旅途。（哈哈！）我們能坐的交通工具大概都坐了：飛機，船，火車(台鐵)，高鐵，捷運，客運，9人座車，7人座車，最扯的是腳踏車。哈哈！Ok, 也許就差了纜車，沒時間去乘搭。因為呢，本來單純的只想去幾天的跨年之旅，最後因為飛機票比較便宜，然後用了反正去了就不要浪費的精神，就把它變成了台北->花蓮->清境(+合歡山)->日月潭->台北的8天之旅。:D

雖然整趟沒有想像的順利，但因為跟對的人一起出國，沒有什麼挑剔的。還沒去之前就出現了小狀況：

「溫馨小貼士：一般買火車票是12天前在網上開賣，但佳節期間還是天天到網站查看最新信息較好。還有真的要提醒負責買票的人要在午夜12時就上網去買。」

因為呢，我就是這樣，失去了一次高鐵的優惠價票，還有一次台鐵的座位票。這次跨年在台灣是連假，他們1月1日至5日都是公定假。所以台鐵的票早一天就開始賣了，而且是1-5日的票都賣，方便他們本地人買來回票。所以結果就是，我一張票都買不到。但，當然的，我們也因為這樣，有了不同的體驗。哈哈。這個，先賣個關子。

第一天，無異議，大家很早就到機場，早到我有一點嚇到，因為他們到的時候我還在家裡。最好笑是，我真的很早就起身了，但沖涼到一半的時候，不知道什麼事電箱跳閘了。=.= 全身都是肥皂，又冷到半死，又這麼早沒有人可以救我... 反正最後我就當作是為了台灣的天氣練習了。

一切順利到住的地方後，就開始找東西吃！哈哈。先來一點水餃／鍋貼。然後到師大夜市。吃了許記生煎包，李阿姨水煎包，蛋餅，滷味，藍家刈包 (My fav!!!!)，然後飽到不行，沒機會吃師大鹽酥雞。:( 然後最好笑的，我們又繼續去附近的兩家咖啡廳(café)，但其實大家都大概不行了！HAHA! 就到了Aranzi Café, 很可愛的地方！吃了熊貓蛋糕(Fruit)和貓貓蛋糕(Yuzi Cheese)和壞東西waffle or something like that. 都很的好可愛，也蠻好吃的。然後又到一家立裴米緹咖啡館官網 (L'apre's midi Cafe')吃有麻糬的waffle. 只能說，雖然很飽了，但還是覺得很好吃。第一天就吃吃喝喝就過完了。很好啊！haha! 因為知道第二天會是非常長的一天，所以就早一點回家休息咯。

第二天，早餐去了我去台北這麼多次都沒有去過的‘永和豆漿’，不知道為什麼，我知道西門町有一家，但就是沒有去過。也許是因為比較常住台北車站附近吧。好喜歡他們的早餐店！(Tip: 要選好了才排隊，不然會被‘酸’）選擇真的好多，而且每樣都好好吃喔！我吃的是饅頭雞蛋豬排堡，還有熱的甜豆漿，鹹豆漿is just not my type. Haha. 然後呢，就去了‘等一個人咖啡’(Café.Waiting.Love)朝聖。哈哈！真的。咖啡店老闆非常的聰明（也真的是‘等一個人咖啡’迷），知道這間店原本只是電影的場景，拍完了就會拆掉，就出了錢把地方買下，讓這間店可以延續下去。然後我們這些都看過電影的人到台北就會想去看一看，喝喝咖啡。說真的，食物並不是最佳的，但氛圍就很好啊！何況我們在等位子的當兒就在門外瘋狂的拍起照來，各式各樣的。:) 宣傳效果非常佳！哈哈！

然後呢，你就會以為我們吃夠了。結果，又跑去吃鼎泰豐。哈哈！小籠包，炒飯，豬排，酸辣湯和肉粽，都有！然後呢，離到跨年現場的時間還蠻多的，就到處逛逛，找一找明星的店，本來想在Zoom In買一點什麼，但什麼都沒買，因爲冬裝真的不行。本來也想看看有沒有吃的，但是不太了解店的規格？所以最後放棄了。也看到了其他的藝人的店，但冬季的，真的沒什麼好買。走到差不多了，慢悠悠的到台北101前的廣場。7點左右，人群已經非常多了。我們到的時候節目剛開始，結果看了一陣子，我們就決定走會101吃點東西再回來，反正還要很久。101的人潮是多到...... 只好分頭買了食物到戶外找位子坐著吃，也花了不少時間。回到舞台哪裡的時候剛好羅志祥就唱完了。我們就繼續找位子看咯。其實大家都還蠻守次序的，只是到了快散場（尤其哪個大咖唱完）的時候，不知從哪裡來的人一定要大家一起擠出來，場面頓時有一點失控。有一度還跟朋友差點失散了，而且真的得站穩腳步，不然大家早就散一地了。:/ All being said, it was still quite exhilarating when we were doing countdown. Oh wait, we were at a little lost at the start, because the host were talking and talking, we turned around to look at Taipei 101 and suddenly we are starting to countdown the last 10sec. Haha! 看完了煙火很多人都逐漸離開了，因為林俊傑（本場的最大咖）已經唱完了。但，我們留下看蕭敬騰。基本上，大家還是蠻有次序的散場，漫步到比較遠一點的捷運，在等待入站的時候還有工作人員“娛樂”我們、還腦筋急轉彎。最後還是因為太多人，分開坐捷運回西門町。

然後呢，休息的時間也沒多少了。迅速整理好東西，就睡了，因為隔天趕早班火車。雖然我們到了以後就到台北車站買票，幸好能預先買票，但也只能買到站票。沒辦法啊！只是，上火車時也不知道我們是怎麼做到的，就上了第一車廂，然後發現它是一節沒有座位的車廂，大家就找了位子放行李，做了下來。太幸運了！（好像這本來是讓乘客趴自行車的地方）而且，我們搭的那班車是不怎麼停站的，所以旅程就相對的變短了。So, it was not too bad after all. So we got to rest a little and sleep a little and eat some breakfast we bought in a rush at the taipei station earlier, until I find my butt super cold cos temperature has dropped a little.

第二次到花蓮，美還是美。重遊了一些地方；有些地方卻已經換了／變了。而且有些步道還是有一些危險。第一次沒走完的步道，同樣的還是沒走完。哈哈！真的太累了。Anyway, 晚上高興到了花蓮的市中心, 至少是上次沒去到的. 沒去夜市, 還是吃到好吃的東西! :D 来成排骨面， 豆花，还有曾记Muachi!!!! 新鮮的麻糬真的太好吃了! 然後真的很累, 就想要回去休息了. 連民宿屋主介紹我們去的跨年晚會有蕭敬騰也根本沒有想去的念頭. 最後他出來接我們到住的地方, 洗澡後還是可以看電視, 現場連接跨年晚會的現場. 也不錯啊! HAHA!

隔天一早就離開了花蓮, 好可惜沒有機會到民宿附近看看. 司機載著先去买阿美麻糬，然后我們一路玩一路到清境. 開始覺得冷了. 很慶幸在一些地方看到非常美麗的景色, 而且在沒有太多的霧的情況下有雲海! 可說是運氣好吧, 因為天氣好的關係. 午饭的地方司机让我们选，所以我们在靠近碧绿神木的地方用餐，吃到蛮好吃的饭餐，外加好喝的加了蜜桃蜂蜜的热茶。还有非常好吃但真的蛮贵的急速冷冻日本菇。虽然一路也蛮赶的，原因是说到清境的路上会经过合欢山，那合欢山在冬天的时候是有时间限制的，过了某时间就不能上下山了。主要是害怕下雪路上湿滑，天暗，会危险。反正到清境的時候天還是亮的. 是唯一一次我們兩兩一房的地方. 哈! 看還有時間就到了小瑞士去走走. 那晚吃火锅！冷天吃点热的食物还是蛮爽的。然后又去吃雪糕。哈哈！

第五天了! 因為是冬天, 所以早上不能上合歡山看日出, 所以只能是觀景. 如果是想看日出的行程，就避开冬天吧。結果, 沒有下雪, 然後也去了一些我們前一天已經路過的地方, 算是沒幹到什麼. 那个司机也不怎么样。最後呢, 司機就把我們放在清境農場. 反正就是relax mah. 時間好早, 綿羊們又不知道為甚麼都不在外面跑來跑去. 我們還是要自我娛樂一下. 有幸摸到了一隻踢了毛的小綿羊, 真的是油油的! 有一點異味, 但還是蠻可愛的啦. 哈哈! 又吃了一堆食物, 等著綿羊秀開始. 只是太陽也很賣力. Lol! 看完秀就又到处拍照咯！Jump shot 不能少! haha! 跳到累到........ 最惨的是，接下来还要走那长长的楼梯下山，499步听起来不多，走起来却是...... 到底的时候，不夸张，真的脚软。幸好，我出国最好的朋友就是安美露(Yoko-yoko). Haha! 在紙箱王(Carton King)吃晚餐後, 又是自由時間啦!

隔天一早吃饱后就出发到日月潭啦。超期待的说...... 景色还是挺宜人的。Ok... that's a understatement. It's a beautiful place! 有一点点长途跋涉，为了一睹整个日月潭的美。但，我觉得值得。谢谢民宿主人热情地分享，也是希望我们不把时间浪费掉了。所以时间过得倒真的充实了。景也看了：到玄奘寺和慈恩塔的距离真不是盖的。斜坡和楼梯统统都来，好不容易才到玄奘寺。休息后又是一系列的楼梯，还要爬上7楼高的慈恩塔，才看得到那整个日月潭的景色。真的就是无限大的感觉。(还有无限远) 而且要原路返回。T.T 然后终于到了大吃大喝的时候，在伊达邵是买了不少食物啊！杰记山猪肉大刈包、烧麻糬、不同口味的烤香肠、阿萨姆奶茶、烤小米麻糬、等等。还有阿萨姆奶茶冰淇淋！就是吃！哈哈！然后赶在最后一班船之前回原来的码头。看到太阳下山！真的好美，但好快！一下子整颗咸蛋黄就在山后不见了。晚餐也在一家蛮不错的餐厅吃：虾子、蛋卷、烧肉...... 在等座位的时候还买了炸香菇 －好吃！哈哈什么都好吃。晚餐后就逛街啦，买了小饰品什么的，反正就是那些游客的精品店。:)

民宿主人也住在同一栋的。他们的房间是真的漂亮，宽阔。也非常的舒服。但只住一晚。他们也建议我们早上可以跟着他们到私房的地方看日出，说是最好的地方，是他们老家的.. (something like that). 我们考虑了以后还是决定了不去，因为很早就要出门，然后要走蛮长的一段路。我们还是想看日出，但决定在码头附近的地方看咯。而且想骑脚踏车，所以不能太晚。结果，由于当天的日出晚了一点，只看到了山后的晨光，没机会等到太阳完全的升起，不过还是觉得蛮美的喔！看时间剩的不多，就出发骑车去了。还以为能骑完整个路线，但我们大概只骑到了一半吧，其实路程是蛮累的。虽然路不颠簸，但斜坡不少，加上早上的太阳也卖力的照在我们身上，只到了游客中心，听了一会儿就返回了。但不得不说，风景真的美。Definitely live up to its name for being one of the most beautiful cycling trails. 各位，最后第二天了，体力透支了也不过分吧。

然后就得赶巴士出日月潭到台中高铁，搭高铁回台北咯。还好有时间买食物，只是我知道自己已经有一点要感冒的迹象了，就买了最方便吃的食物＝寿司，想换来多一点的休息时间；放弃了看起来非常好吃的高铁便当。幸好，我做的选择没有错，10分钟内吃完，然后睡觉。隔壁都还没吃到一半，我就已经不省人事了。哈哈

回到台北又是一系列的血拼：去了诚品，挣扎了很久，然后买了五本非常重的书。:x 还有大吃大喝（对，又大吃大喝）到我最喜欢的饶河夜市啦！好吃的食物还是那里最多；我们真的吃非常多。上次吃过的，加上新发现的。然后去了佳德糕饼，现在有新的捷运线到饶河还有佳德门口（还有小巨蛋），真的超棒的！不需要再走那么多路了，也是因为这样，我们才回去了原本没有在计划内的饶河。:D 回宿舍放下买的东西后，还早，所以又到了比较靠近我们的宁夏夜市。我头一次去喔！没什么大不同的东西，但炸芋圆还是好吃的，还有50岚，此旅行第一次喝。然后就是收拾行李的时候啦...... 这次住的宿舍 - Star Hostel, 我还蛮喜欢的。干净：因为进去房间的范围前，就得把鞋子换成他们提供的拖鞋。只是需要上楼：行李也要搬上去。应该多数住的都是背包客吧。而且观察到多数都是韩国人哦。

最后一天!!!! :( 一早去找早餐店，才发现上次那间已经扩大了，结果就去了隔几间的老式早餐店，非常的好吃! 吃了蛋饼和豆浆，非常不想回来。然后就去了动物园看小圆仔（但其实它的体型已经不小了）！<3 熊猫！:D 然后再回到西门町，大家各自做最后的冲刺。在最后一天吃了豪大大鸡排，也许上两次都没有吃，这次吃还觉得蛮好吃的！大家都大包小包后，时间就差不多了。Woowoowoo...... 回到宿舍，把行李整理好就走了。对！还买了楼下的甜甜圈，后来排长龙咯。结果飞机晚点，迟了约一小时才到新加坡，凌晨1点多、快2点才到！早买的飞机票不算太贵，就不计较了。@.@

All in all... I love Taiwan.

如果要跨年，现在可以安排了哦！

My Daddy. My Superhero.

今天听到《心情小抽屉》一个爸爸的故事，竟然听到哭了。不只是她的故事感动到我，同时也想到我爸爸。最近都在说一些父亲节，关于爸爸的故事。跟很多的女生一样，我也觉得我爸爸是全世界最好的爸爸。爸爸是我的superhero。我只是常常觉得我做女儿有时非常的失败，爸爸不年轻了，但生活上的很多事情都是爸爸做，爸爸承担的。就连水电费都是。他也从来没有要求我们做这些。连以前父亲节出外吃大餐时，也碰上我这个六月宝宝，一起庆祝，还要爸爸出钱。

My dad may not be the most wealthy dad, we take public transport, we do not have aircon, we do not have a big house, but he gave whatever he could afford. We travel a lot when we were young, he was the sole bread winner and now retired for more than 10 years but he never asked us for money or whatsoever. He never ever stressed that we should be the ones taking care of all the household expenses or any of the sorts, not even when buying electrical appliances. He gave us all lessons that develop us to be people with culture and someone with at least some skills. He offer to wash dishes when he sees that we are all tired from a day's work, he makes tea for us every single time we asked for it. No complaints ever. 

The most thankful thing I had towards my dad would be that he ever encouraged me to study Erhu, not just that, he wanted me to go Beijing or Shanghai. How many parents would encourage or allow or even, be the one to suggest their child to take this path. But I know I wasn't good enough for that. But deep down I was really touched and I kept on remembering that I have such wonderful parents who are always supportive of what I do even though they were a little worried at some points of my studies and my career. I know that I will never in my whole life, able to repay what my parents have done for me. 

But I hope that I'll be able to provide my parents with more comfort and happiness soon and make them less worry for me. 

They both are going on a trip to Tibet tonight, I hope for them safe flights and transport throughout the trip, that they will enjoy the trip without being down of any illness, not even the slightest flu or food poison or diahhroea and be back safely. I miss them already. 

I love you both papa and mama. 

Birthday. 又来了. 然后走了.

I was never the 'Hey, you want to meet and celebrate my birthday' kind of person. I am still not. If anyone wants to celebrate for me, I'd be happy. I didn't expect anyone to celebrate with me this year. After all, with the passive kind of mentality I have, I should get lesser and lesser celebrations right? I really need to thank my friends for putting in effort to make me feel loved. As much as I didn't really feel like celebrating my own birthday anyway (partially cos I'm getting older), I enjoyed each and every meet up with the friends. In small group or big group, it doesn't really matter. To where we go, it doesn't really matter as well. Because I really loved the company. I'm not sure if it's me being Gemini or not, or it is just me that even though a little on the quiet side sometimes, also very noisy when with the right company. haha!

Furthermore, I'm only in this company for about a month, hence, I would never expect anything from anyone in the company cos I would expect anyone to know as well. But friend announced loudly in office (several times). Lol! Then she and lunch khaki wanted to treat me lunch! :D Even though in the end we went to the ramen that serves free ramen to birthday person on actual day, even comes with a side dish! Lol! So they decided to get me cake too.

In fact, I had already 5 different cakes through the day. Lucky thing I didn't redeem my free cake from Starbucks. Of course I shared the cake, even if I ate most for some of them. So they got me 2 cakes from Cake Spade (we sat there to finish them, I even had candles, I don't even the last time I had 1 lol!), 2 from the 2 cute interns, and 1 from the sister :D To prove the happiness further, I haven't had so many cakes for the longest ever. I am a happy girl. :)

Happy girl ended the day with an awesome concert and a lovely time with the sister! :D Kit Chan was amazing, she was so good! I loved the way she spoke too. Everything felt so comfortable. :)

月老。--@九把刀

前一天看完《等一个人。咖啡》以后，终于找到从台湾买回来的那几本书，拿出这本。

昨晚没有出门，吃完饭就躺在床上开始读。读一读，就放不下了。只觉得，这个阿纶“黑人牙膏”真的很好笑，很白痴，却痴情。然后读到这一段的时候，突然有了熟悉感。

重返《等一个人。咖啡》

今天重新看了《等一个人。咖啡》。

因为读了原著小说，内容很不一样，但在读的时候，一直在用想象力把故事的情节和电影的人物连起来，所以一边读的时候，仿佛已经忘了电影版是什么样子，就想再看多一遍。

电影跟小说的内容差蛮多的。人物的关系也有不同。而且，书里的故事和人物都看起来比较有趣耶！只能说，各有各的好吧。因为当初只看电影的时候也觉得已经很棒了啊！可能要把所有的事都放到电影太多细节、太多焦点，不太符合。除了结果是一样的以外，其他的都改变了不少。

一样的是，都有很白痴的部分，也都有让我感动的地方。今天再看电影的时候也这么觉得。因为笑的地方又笑了，白痴也说了好几遍，哭的地方又哭了一遍。记得在读小说的时候，最后转捩点的部分让我有特多的惊喜，尤其是金刀嫂让她为菜取名的那一个。书里，阿拓从来都没有说喜欢思萤，却做了很多事来证明。读小说哭得这样，很蠢吧。而且明明半夜了，真的死都要读完。真的没办法。电影里的阿拓告白了，虽然看起来不太认真。而且，不同的是，电影用的是爱情的巧合，让这两个单纯认为不是爱情的人一直巧合的遇上，是很浪漫，却少了书里阿拓为他们共同创造的许多回忆。

惭愧的说，我花了很多时间才读完小说。科技的进步让我没有耐性再每天一直拿着书本一直读。当然，是我自己的问题。我常常以为自己把书带出门是会读的。但只要有手机在身边，心思和注意力就没有办法放到书上。要真的读意来的时候才有办法读多一点。已经没有以前那种读小说的热忱了。:( 又喜欢买书，又没有动力读书，不知道在干嘛。-.-

“每个人都在等一个人。”

“每一个人，都在等一个人，等待一个能够看到你与众不同的人。”

等。继续等。

还有，今后要多读书。

Just Sharing Thoughts

是的. 一年又過去了. 沒想到一年比一年寫的少了. 結果因為這樣好像很多的東西可能都忘記了. 那天在電台聽到一首晚班DJ介紹的英文歌曲. 她直接提到了歌詞有一句"I always try to not remember rather than forget". '忘記'也許就是一件多麼難的事. 發生了就是發生了, 有些事不是說想忘記就可以忘記. '不記得'又跟'忘記'有什麼不同呢? 好像有點難分辨. 也許, 分別就在, 你可以選擇不去'記得', 但不能選擇'忘記'. 有些事情, 不去觸碰到, 你就不會想起來, 但不代表你已經把它忘了. 如果我以前不再是他的朋友, 也許我就不會常常想起那些事. 但現在想想, 有很多事都已經模糊了. 我也不是非想起來不可, 但也許這樣情感上有一點點的寄託. 還沒有找到下一個不代表不會有, 我也相信, 那天的到來會改變現在對他還有一點懸念的感覺.

最近, 林俊傑的《可惜沒如果》是不是也把你打動了呢?

假如把犯得起的错 能错的都错过
应该还来得及去悔过

假如没把一切说破
那一场小风波 将一笑带过

在感情面前 讲什么自我
要得过且过 才好过

全都怪我
不该沉默时沉默 该勇敢时软弱
如果不是我 误会自己洒脱 让我们难过
可当初的你 和现在的我 假如重来过

倘若那天
把该说的话好好说 该体谅的不执著
如果那天我 不受情绪挑拨 你会怎么做
那么多如果 可能如果我
可惜没如果 只剩下结果

如果早点了解 那率性的你
或者晚一点 遇上成熟的我

不过

全都怪我
不该沉默时沉默 该勇敢时软弱
如果不是我 误会自己洒脱 让我们难过
可当初的你 和现在的我 假如重来过

倘若那天
把该说的话好好说 该体谅的不执著
如果那天我 不受情绪挑拨 你会怎么做
那么多如果 可能如果我
可惜没如果 没有你和我

都怪我
不该沉默时沉默 该勇敢时软弱
如果不是我 误会自己洒脱 让我们难过
可当初的你 和现在的我 假如重来过

倘若那天
把该说的话好好说 该体谅的不执著
如果那天我 不受情绪挑拨 你会怎么做
那么多如果 可能如果我
可惜没如果 只剩下结果
可惜没如果



很多事情都是沒有'如果'的. 如果我那時不這麼衝動, 如果那天我能夠冷靜一點, 不受朋友誘惑, 不讓他們主宰我們的事, 如果我從來沒有對任何人說的話... 這麼多如果, 可能如果我, 可惜沒如果, 沒有你和我, 只剩下結果... 結果就是我自己不肯放過我自己. 我放下了, 但我沒有原諒我自己的執著. 雙子明明就是三心兩意的人, 為甚麼我要對一件事堅持那麼久? 兩件. 另一件是工作.

我覺得有時我對這些事的執著是過於我能承受的. 我也想知道, 我到底是哪一步走錯了? 到底怎麼挽回? 也許能挽回的就是現在好好的工作. :x

I can only say, 'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'. I'm faced with disappointment every single day and every single time I apply for something. I don't know if I'm getting stronger, but I'm definitely getting used to it. And I'm just gonna try again.

Music being the Center of my Life.

If anything is blog-worthy in my life, it must be the concerts: either those I performed in, or those I went to watch. And just so happened that they happen to me quite often to me. HAHA!

Ever since I don't remember when, there are times I just won't be able to meet anyone on saturdays because I have a concert to attend. LOL! But it's not really my fault, is it? :)

A few to name these few months. (Actually I might just list all)

1. Our People, Our Music 2014 (OPOM)

I don't know why I signed up for it, but well, it has to be memorable somehow even though I'm not part of SYCO anymore. It made me seems like I'm still part of sy, at least for a while. Haha!

It was a lot of waiting and waiting, standing and sitting around, oh wells, I asked for it right? Haha! nonetheless, we are already the lucky lot. So I shan't complain. And aren't all of us proud of breaking the 2 Guinness Records? I guess that's worth it then. :)

2. "孫天后" 孫燕姿的《克卜勒》
全民共樂過後的一個禮拜, 又回到了國家體育場, 參加第一個在那個場地舉行的流行音樂演唱會. 因為前一個禮拜才去過, 所以知道裡面的空氣不流通, 也許會很熱. 只是沒想到, 隔一排的差距就是前一排較高價位的位子有手扇, 從我們這一排就沒有了. -.- 而且早就知道那個場地的音效是沒辦法做到很好的. 況且沒想到, 舞台搭建在很遠的地方, 所以我們離地上的座位和舞台都非常的遠, 少了的是親近感. 就少了一些'身在其中'的感覺. 但是, 感覺天后的表演又比上次好了許多. 不知道是不是因為當了媽媽, 幽默感多了一些, 膽識和信心也多了, 所有的演唱都平穩. 況且, 那天她是帶病上陣的. 真的辛苦了! :) 幸好沒有因為上次的小失望而這次沒去! 還有, 真的喜歡新專輯裡的《克卜勒》，《天使的指紋》，還有《尚好的青春》! 太好聽了!

3. MCO Beautiful Sunday 美麗的星期天
隔天就是自己的演出了. Haha! 很久沒有這麼緊張的上一場表演. 說實在, 我要是真那麼棒, 早就去讀音樂了. 我就是知道我沒有那個料, 所以只可以玩玩. 在樂團這麼多年, 我沒有一次逃不過拉板胡的, 除了這一次. =.= 而且我有的時間是如此的短啊! 還有一段高胡solo, 差一點沒死掉. Haha! 我得承認, 板胡是我比較緊張的部分. 還好, 最後的表現還是可以的. 沒有我以前需要獨奏的時候那麼緊張. 不知道是不是上了年紀, 心情比較平穩, 呼吸不會那麼急促? 或者現在慢的東西我還是應付得來的. 哈哈! 最近聽到錄音才第一次聽到那天的表現. 不能說非常好, 但至少, 我在錄音中聽到了讚嘆聲. 哈哈! 而且, 香港的朋友還私訊說我拉得好! 真的非常高興. Hehe! :D 結果那一段我自己聽了好幾遍. (自我小陶醉一下沒關係吧) 其他的就別說了. Haha! 心知肚明就好. 第一次感觉自己赞自己到这样不要脸. (说真的，现在脸皮好像真的厚了很多). 还有开心的是，和那边的朋友聚一聚. :)

4. SSO @ Re-Opening of VCH
Very exciting event as we all re-visited the site, with everything refurbished so nicely, to give us a modern yet classic feeling of the place. Some of the things may have changed, but it feels really good to be back to place where many concerts were held at. A pity that I have never performed there before, and I don't know if I ever will have the chance to, but I was definitely privileged to be there on this occasion. But I have to sit, sitting under the covered area on the stall seats is still not satisfactory and doesn't justify the sound from the stage properly. A pity. I still remember the days it was the performing venue for SCO, East zone camps, and other schools/community centres concert. We spent so many weekends there. Even though toilet queue has always been a problem and there's absolutely no food around as well, and that the seats were in bad condition nearing the end before the renovation, it was the memories. I still remember the concert I watched someone I liked perform on stage. I still remember the watching some talented people I admired at some concert. The memories of secondary school life. And you haven't realised, but I haven't said a thing about the concert. Other than Ng Pei-Sian, I don't really know what else to say about the concert. HAHA! :x Oh ya, I already talked about the sound. Hopefully I will get to perform there one day.

5. The Sound of Music Musical @ MBS Theatres
One of my favourite films since young. Probably because my sister always watch it, all the lovely songs, and me listening to the soundtrack countless times. I was a little confused with the plot and songs selection/sequence, only to find out that was closer to the original broadway than the film. Oops. Looks like we were all brainwashed by the film. Nevertheless, most of the songs remained the same and it was a joy to be there.

6. 苏打绿's 十周年演唱会 AIR Singapore
名字非常長, 就這樣吧. 可以說這場演唱會絕對是這年最最最迫不及待想看的演唱會. 自己一個人很早就到了會場, 可惜這裡的氣氛果然不比台北的, 沒有人這麼早就去排隊買周邊商品啦. 所以很快就買到了. 值得高興的是演唱會並沒有延遲很久才開始. 沒有AIR watch 兼螢光棒的手環,  但有贊助商的熒光棒和一些贈品, 也算不錯. 他們場的每一首歌都好喜歡喔, 對我來說, 最興奮的莫過於那個360度旋轉舞台. 之前看到台北場視頻的時候, 他們唱著《相信》, 旋轉舞台突然升起的那一刻, 我眼淚直接流了出來. 沒想到可以在新加坡場看到它. 真的非常棒! 好像那也是暐哲最驕傲的事. Haha! 但新加坡這場, 不管什麼時候,'高興'的感覺都勝過了一切. 我好像只有一直大聲的笑, 還有對自己傻笑. 哈哈! 尤其是小威bai kah 的事, 就一直拿出來講. 太好笑了! 當然, 還有演唱的部份啦! 大概喜歡的歌都唱了吧. 或者說, 反正我沒有什麼不喜歡的歌, 他們唱什麼歌我都很開心! 雖然主唱大人真的不喜歡大家說他們很好笑, 比較想聽到他們唱的好好. 可他骨子裡就喜歡有點搞笑. 明明自己總是忍不住要搞笑, 然後又說我們不要什麼都笑, 會不會太過份了一點? 哈哈! 尤其拜託我們說因為演唱會結束硬逼我們說'YAY'的那段, 任性極了! 但, 是我不會忘記的一場演唱會.

7. 香港中樂團 @ Esplanade
期待已久的音樂會, (是不是很跳tone? Haha) 反正因為去年十二月到香港去的時候朋友就說了, 所以真的等很久. 演出, 就只能說, 很喜歡閻惠昌! HAHA! 還有演出的曲目. 可惜我們的位子也許比較不好, 在3樓, 音樂廳的音響沒有調好, 所以弦樂的聲音無法完整的傳達上來, 管樂就略為大聲. 不過後來聽坐在一樓的朋友說, 他們聽到比較大聲的是弦樂, 管樂則比較小聲. 看來管樂的聲音都被打上來了. 確實有點浪費了這樂團的實力.

除了看演出, 還有當導遊帶朋友到處走. 在香港的時候就答應了. 而且不管我們誰去, 他們都熱情招待的. 結果我們安排了三天的環島吃喝玩行程. 說真的, 有些地方我們自己都沒去過. 哈~ 而且吃了大概一整年才會吃到的量的本地食物. 結果, 朋友回國後, 我完全沒有想吃任何東西的慾望.

8. Ruan Chamber Concert @ Esplanade Recital Studio (by SCO)
Only went to watch because of Minhui. Seems like many things have changed in our lives, but not the music. It's always been a pleasure to hear some of the musicians play: Minhui is one of them :) The music, though simple, is very captivating. Just like how she played Yu Hou Ting Yuan. Could only say, I went there just to watch her. <3

9. Kalakan @ The Voices by Esplanade
Not really knowing what we were in for, I went because Ekjun and Yvonne recommended them. Saw a short clip of theirs when dymc went to Sarawak for Rainforest Music Festival. It turned out that they were really good. Even though they are from this small country called Basque, I have no idea where that is (somewhere in or near Spain), and can't understand their language. But, music really doesn't depend on language. With some simple explanation on the numbers, and the power of their vocals, it's not difficult to feel the music. Couldn't resist but to stand up, clap along and sing along. It was not a long concert, but definitely an enjoyable one. :)

10. MCO 10th Anni Concert @ Esplanade
My last performance for the year. Never felt I put in so much effort into a concert before, I wanted to make it the best one, but then again, it's always about everyone, and not just 1 person in the orchestra. Or even, majority. You just need 1 person to ruin it. (just a saying, not pointing at anyone). No matter how many practices I went to, (actually all the practices since Oct) and a number of extra practices on weekday night, it doesn't make a difference if the section hasn't even come together once until the rehearsal. Yup, I understand that everyone may have their own commitments in life, I used to have mine as well. And I burnt all my Saturdays to go to practice at somewhere so far even though it's my only free day all week. What I'm saying is, well if you have so many commitments, you ought to choose the priority, and give up some of them some times. It doesn't hurt, really. More so if in the end you tired yourself out and also drag the others with you. There's a possibility of finding more players at an earlier stage rather than every week having hopes that this person will come, and the person just doesn't turn up at all. It's an issue of responsibility. An orchestra isn't an orchestra if the players don't play together most of the time. And that's probably why we need to add practices and tired everyone out and had so many 'surprises' at the end of the day.

有時我覺得是老師太縱容大家了. 如果是我, 至少最後一個月的練習大家都應該來, 不然就別上了. 這是以大局為重, 而不是因為個人欲望的事.

And kids nowadays, have to be spoon-fed with answers. They are supposed to be smart, so it's not that they don't know, more or they don't want to try. We the seniors were practicing hard even though we already know our stuff and trying to perfect it, but they just sat there and did nothing. They didn't even attempt to try on their own when the scores were given months ago. Don't understand why we are still teaching them at the last week before the concert. I was practicing right beside the girl just to motivate her to practice also, but she just sat there and did nothing. Hello! I don't even need to practice anymore. -.-

In the end, can't say I didn't make any mistakes, in fact, I made quite a few, though not major, but I feel bad enough. I would have played much better if it wasn't for my sore back. :/ Need to remind myself to get muscle patch the next time I perform because sitting straight-backed for a whole day is a no-joke.

But this concert has made us bond better, think of solutions to savage and not immerse in the so-called good image from people who doesn't play the music at all. Happy that at least we get to play some traditional music, although a mix will bring more audience. Well, I've done my job. I used to be quite hack care about such things because I'm just someone who plays occasionally in the orchestra, I don't know where the sense of responsibility suddenly come from. Perhaps I just wanted them to be more efficient. Super waste time some of the time. Glad that it's over, but then again, kinda miss the music playing time. Till the next time! Hope it's not too soon, so that I have more free saturdays.

With the year coming to an end, just 1 more concert to go! i.e. Jay Chou's Opus II, which was supposed to be on 8 Nov, but it's going to be tomorrow! :D Excited! But not crazy over it. Well, first time, just to experience it. :)

Ok, maybe that's not the last. The last will be on 31st Dec in Taipei! ;)

And due to budget constraints to save up for the much awaited trip, I resisted and had to give up a few other interesting stuff this year, like Mamma Mia musical. Oh well, I'm sure I will get to catch it in future, maybe in London? Who knows.

Till then! Good bye for the year! :D

Just when nothing went right. Nothing.

最近發生了很多快樂和不快樂的事。但人的腦袋很奇怪，總是讓我們只記得不快樂的事。其實現在大概沒有人到這裡讀我寫的東西了吧？所以我是寫給自己看的。

這兩個禮拜我也許想事情真的是有點鑽牛角尖，但我也不是無憑無據地這麼想。突然想起小學的時候，也有一次是這樣。但那時多的是一份背叛感。當然，有些事可能就是我自己幻想出來的。但想一想，那段時間對現在的我來說就好像一場夢一樣。以前也何嘗不是三個人好朋友的關係，被我自己的‘佔有慾’和‘妒忌心’毀了嗎？也不知道以前哪來的勇氣！也許每一組朋友裡，不管幾個人，你都一定會有跟你比較要好的一位，多人的話也不會覺得怎麼樣，但三個人的時候，那個‘一個人’就...... 所以，我應該就是那位咯。結果沒想到，現在重現了？

其實想一想，很多事有這樣的結局很合理啊？因為問題就出在我自己身上。其實這幾天我也反思了很多，一直很想知道，為什麼我的人生就要這樣？然後又確定的接受我先天的個性和缺點，注定我在大多數的事情上，是個失敗者。

1. 我其實很沒有膽量，我從小什麼都怕，姐姐說我黏我媽黏到不行。她不在，我連我外婆要帶我去買好吃的我都不敢跟，好像怕她會把我賣掉一樣。所以我不喜歡獨奏，也沒有那個能力獨奏；只要是獨奏，我一定做不好。不然我也不會學了這麼久，又很喜歡的東西，卻又做不好。所以，小時候媽媽每次哄我上台唱歌我都抗拒。所以，我從小到現在都沒有變，還是這麼地畏懼所有這些事。所以，我現在還是一樣什麼都怕，有時候卻故作堅強。

2. 我本來就不合群，或者說我獨立於自己的生活。我不輕易對任何說出我心裡的話。開心或不開心，都是自己的事。就算是家人也一樣。也許姐姐們都大我太多了。以前我最能哭訴的人就是我同歲的表妹，但當然長大以後也很少了。我從什麼時候開始，只要是不開心的，就只會自己躲起來哭，不可能會讓別人知道我發生了什麼事。（啊，以前的確有那麼一個人是我會主動跟他講的，現在沒有了）其實這是一個很矛盾的心理。就是我並不想直接地跟任何人說，卻希望有人會看得出來／發現。我以前在學校就是不需要和朋友一起上廁所的人，所以我應該沒有什麼朋友，因為朋友都是在這些時候交心的。然後又很geng的假裝不在意。才怪啦！

3. 其實說起來我這人就是一個很矛盾的人。就是一個人又不行，又怕跟別人一起的人。哈哈！我也很怕尷尬，所以對不熟的人我肯定不能一對一，而且我會盡量躲避。其實我很怕別人來安慰我，因為我不知道該說什麼。不習慣把內心的話說出來。可是我卻想要有人知道，希望有人會心疼我，有人會拉著我的手，抱著我，告訴我，我不是我想像的那樣，告訴我一切都會過去的。可是也沒有人這麼做過。也許我在人們面前都掩飾得很好。應該就是人們說的‘表裡不一’吧。-.-'''

4. 我覺得我真的是一個運氣很差的人。至少我覺得我從中學畢業的那刻起，‘好運’就沒有再在我的人生出現過。例子就不需要給了。大概每一個對我很重要的人事物都沒有一個是好的。有很多錯綜複雜的事件發生，有時我也無法理解。今年大家都說兔子今年的運氣很好。對，也許那些‘好運’不夠填補我的‘歹運’，然後我又把他們花在比較無關緊要的東西。可是我的人生竟然可以不順遂到這個地步？學業不怎麼樣，事業很不怎麼樣，友情一點點，有時也不怎麼樣，愛情一點都沒有，運氣沒有，家人... 家家有本難念的經。我到底有什麼？

5. 不知道是不是雙子的人都是這樣？常常就看到很多雙子的人都跟我一樣。可是我現在是一個連自己都顧不了的人，又怎麼有資格去顧別人呢？雙子還是不找雙子談心或幫忙解決問題的好，找別星座的吧。


星期五通常是朋友常會約的時候。昨天晚上放工後，我一個人過著孤獨的晚上。自己放工，自己吃晚餐，自己做所有的事。最後，自己走回家。其一是我不想這麼快回家，其二是我需要更多安靜的時刻 (as if I haven't had enough of the silence in my life), 再者是這安靜的時刻讓我可以想一想一直掛在心上的事。走了大約一小時四十分鐘才回到家。也經過那時間的思考，才有這篇。

說吧，這五六個月以來，我遇到的波折甚至比以前的嚴重得多。畢竟我已經工作了這麼多年，但在別人眼中卻一點價值都沒有的話，不就說明了什麼嗎？甚至我能說是個窘境，到了我有時候會覺得我已經不能活下去了，時常讓我對自己非常非常的懷疑(雖然現在還是懷疑)，因為到現在我都還是個失敗者。當然我真的非常非常感謝在這段時間一直問候我，幫助我的人，要不是他們，我現在可能不知道會在做什麼。


最後，你現在問我，我連一件快樂的事情都想不起來。

June is meant for celebrations :D

Yay! Like the title suggested, June is for celebrations! haha! Probably started on 1st June. HAHA. Okay, have to admit that it didn't last for the whole month lah. I couldn't afford also. :/

First was from the best ex-colleague turn friends and vocal classmates I could ever get. Although it was super unfortunate that our vocal coach had to spill the beans the previous lesson. I just pretended I didn't hear anything. Lol! But the awkward silence moment and I guessed the girls really wanted to kill him already. HAHAHA! It's so super funny and yet I have to act blur and contain my laughter. And so it was teoheng session after the class with the 2 'drop-outs' joining us. And then tbh, I saw them choosing the birthday song. Like... I'm not blind lah. Maybe yx was blind cos I think he really didn't notice. Haha! But still, it was a sweet thought. :) Then was dinner with them. It may not be the best meal, but having mates like them was one of the most blessed thing that happened to me for the past year. :) And we had cakes! And cards! :) And I got a present as well! I think that's my only physical present this year. Not that I'm a fussy person about birthdays, but they really took note of what I like, because we were shopping for stuff one day and I merely mentioned I like that ear piece. They went back to buy it another day. So much love. <3

And then, I met up with one of the most important group of friends in my JC life. They made my JC life much happier and fun-filled. The CO peeps. Grateful to have met them. Though tbh, I already knew Jiewan, Jonathan and Deshun way before entering NY. haha! But well, CO would have been different without them around. And every single meet-up with them is always filled with laughter throughout. No other group of friends are like them. And tbh, other than myself, the other 2 pairs were friends on their own, so I'm really very glad that they have never left me behind, and Emily is always really sweet and made no one felt left out or absent from our meet ups. We don't meet a lot, and I do miss them a lot. :)

And then... although both these occasions weren't exactly meant as birthday celebrations, I have the right to put them under the same category. Right? And so, had lunch with the once ex-colleagues (haha, aiya long story) because Agnes wanted to treat us 3 girls (no, not jz and mw) for helping her with stuffs. Nice lunch, nice chatting with them after I left for 2 months. And then, because of free tickets (hahaha), I get to meet Liyana. Miss talking to this girl. Again, we don't meet up very often, but meeting her always made me happier, filled with more confidence, and regain memories when we were in school. I do miss some of my LASALLE classmates, don't I? :)

And there was Meiting's wedding. Really a very joyous occasion, and lotsa catching up with the friends from mco. How long haven't all of us performed together?! And that's probably why I decided to go on and perform for the 10th anni concert. HAHA! (Not really because I wanted to), and tbh, that's one of the only few avenues for me to play with orchestra now. (sad to say).

And then the luckiest thing that happened in months, (yup, other than that, everything was rather crap), I won tickets to Springwave Concert 春浪音樂節 in Singapore on 7 June. Sister was as happy as I was. So ya, we went together. So exciting as there were some Tainan food stalls as well! :D My 棺材板 & 滷肉飯 & 鹽酥雞!! *Drools* (Though we were supposed to be there for the music. haha) So anyways, we thought we were there mainly to watch Jam Hsiao and Amei lah. Hehe. When we got there, it was 郭書瑤 singing. So we were eating the yummy food and listening from far away, apparently, it wasn't as bad as we expected. haha! Could tell that she really put in a lot of effort to train and most of them are not her own songs. Then there was Bii 畢書盡, 丁當, 蕭敬騰 & 張惠妹. Have to say we enjoyed ourselves very much. Even though we are not at the best seats, it was very 'high'! So excited to see Jam and Amei again!!! <3 :D I hope next time will be JJ and Sodagreen though. HAHA!

Next was our 2nd breakthrough performance, and family gathering plus seeing the little nephew. Breakthrough was all right, a little better than I expected but I knew I could do better than that. Looking forward to the next one. Nephew was sleeping most of the time and not feeling well, but managed to catch up with the cuzzie a bit, before they left. And they cut the cake without waiting for me! (Even though it was also my birthday cake) LOL! Anyway I had to leave after that for HCCO concert, to support Bernard for his concerto. And partially because the conductor was Wei Yanming, so I didn't mind going. HAHA! =x

And then there was my birthday. Actually I never called for any celebrations on my birthday. If people wants to share the occasion with me, I'd be happy. But it's just my birthday, I wouldn't really want to trouble any one to give their time up for me, not even my family. And so, I had a solo-activity-afternoon, after having sumptuous lunch with daddy (which I just treat it as my birthday lunch even if it's not). I was contemplating between movie and cycling, no good movie timings, so I went cycling instead, which I was thankful that I did. Cycling alone wasn't boring anyway, I had plans. I brought with me my polaroid and a roll of films just for my own birthday project. Sighting scenes I would love to record down. And just to do one of my favourite activity - watching planes take off.  And thinking of how I could take pictures to depict 1206. I was trying to look for the numbers, later I decided that I should try to be creative. Thus I got something that says 'No. 1', 2 pieces of clothing for the birthday (Hehe, excuses I know), 0 from the top of my drink, and '6' from my block number 132, which represents very much on my life - 1 bro-in-law, 3 sisters and 2 parents, adding up to 6, making up what my family is, which is very important to my life. :)

Ok, and then it was really celebration. HAHA! I need to thank the 2 for taking leave from work to do this with me. Yay to fellow June babies. :D We went to Water Adventure Cove, spent some good time playing with water and waiting in the queues. haha! Had some good laughs. And to the korean bbq dinner with the Beloveds for both Qin and my birthday. The group of friends I will never abandon and I know will never abandon me :) <3 I don't have to say much, because hanging out together for 14 years with most of them is nothing fake. <3

And then, although it was really part of the #1206, but I do consider it as one. i.e. joining Yes933 for their night cycling event. Have to say the waiting was really longgggg, the route took us to some place I've never been before and to our surprise the sights were very beautiful; looking at Singapore from a different angle. :) It was then some supper, some activities before heading back to ecp to end the trip. Tiring but nice. :)

Of course, I needa thank all the friends whom managed to remember and made an effort to send me a msg. More than happy to have them than anything else. And so with this, I'm ending this super late post. HAHAHA!

And I'm lazy to look for the photos. So... if you want to see them, find them in my instagram or fb. :D

Breaks are meant for Enjoyment like Food and Concerts. Loads.

Finally felt guilty that I haven't been updating the blog even though I haven't been working. Not that anyone is still reading it, but penning down has always been the most reliable source of memory for me. And thus, it means that there are a lot of things I might have forgotten through these months. haha! (Ok, maybe I could refer to my instagram for some memories retrieval)

Life is still as happening as ever, before the funds run dry and the mother at home starts nagging. =x Sometimes I'm not at choice for this right? Oh wells, hopefully things will turn out to be better.

Anyhows, a few updates on the happening stuff in my life lately then.

三登《天冷就回来》

今年看了第三次的《天冷就回来》音乐剧，也就是说，他们上演了三次，我三次都看了。记得我看第一、第二次的时候都说‘不知道下一次我还会不会要看’。但是，票一出，就忍不住要买票了。哈哈！所以就去看了咯！

这次的演员又很不一样了。 但说真的，除了 George Chan 和 Joanna Dong 三次都演回一样的角色，其他的演员都换过了。尤其阿强和小静更是次次不同。喜欢或不喜欢就见仁见智了。本身当然是喜欢第一次演阿强的陈瑞彪。哈哈！至于小静：也许是石欣卉吧。

看到现版的成叔出场，突然想起上一次演成叔的林燮毅，更想起他的声音的确是无人能比。

故事没有变，也许编曲变了一点，也许加入了一些更流行的元素，但我始终没有买该音乐剧的原声带。可以说我有点老古板，我一向比较喜欢听原版的歌曲。除非重唱的人真的唱得很好。

看了三次，发现自己最喜欢的歌还是那几首。哈哈！无非就是《让夜轻轻落下》，《从你回眸那天起》。哈哈！Ok, 我又得承认我喜欢比较冷门的歌，其他的也都好听，都是我会听的，只是偏爱。

还没有看过此音乐剧的朋友，不要再拖了。快点买票去看啦！听说过了这次，也许不会再演了。而且周末的票好像都售完了，买不到票，以后又没得看，到时可不要后悔！还有，当然是要支持本地的音乐剧啦！

再遇见

当朋友提到你以前喜欢的人和他现任女友的时候，你的反应会是什么？

也不能说我超不想听，也不知道听到好的还是坏的比较开心，哈哈！

对这个人，我没有疑问的说我早就放下了。况且，我们不是完全没有联络的朋友。只是，只要有朋友提起，心还是会不经意抽动一下。也不知道我在担心什么。

现在每当听到这首歌，就会不禁想到那个人，只是，我觉得我是那个停留在原点的那个人。可是，我也会想说谢谢。


有一天我也希望我是那个继续往前走的人。

First farewell

Had a surprise farewell party by the colleagues. We thought it was going to be a small dinner with the boss at her place. It turned out that some other colleagues were already there waiting for us. Well I sort of suspected a few of them because of some illogical things they were saying. So anyway I forgot about it while on our way there and of course I don't want to spoil anything if it's real. Haha! 

But really touched to see them there! One intern couldn't join us though. Had fun talking, eating, singing and laughing. There's even a decor and cake and they made a video which I watched until I cried because it was just toooo funny. All the fun that we had, even though it was just a few months with some of them. 

Totally grateful for colleagues turn friends like them. Will never forget them for sure. And I hope my colleagues in future could be at least a bit fun-loving like them. As the little gifts from them. Totally awed by the effort that was put in. Love. 

Say Goodbye

After all, it's not so difficult. Because I'm not that important to them anyway. Received a few goodbye hugs from the students, good enough I thought. Haha!

So, the CO colleague received plenty of presents, long and lovely messages during and after the event. And I have to tell her, that CO students are the best. HAHA! And it was actually quite fun to manage her event this time round. Although I enjoyed my own too. :)

All in all, I'm thankful for all these times I'm able to go through. I was half-hearted to whether I should continue, but too many things happened that made me very clear that I don't want to continue anymore, and it' not because of the workload but the people who made the workload worst.

Made it clear and got the load off. Not that I really wished this to happen, it has to happen. Like I always say, everything that comes, I will take it with stride. Now I will take it as a choice and I hope I've made the right choice. :)